We donít really care why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on
our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or it is against us. There is no middle
I invented the chicken. I invented the road. Therefore, the chicken crossing the road represented
the application of these two Different functions of government in a new, reinvented way designed to
bring greater services to the American people.
The chickenís habitat on the original side of the road had been Polluted by unchecked industrialist
greed. The chicken did not reach the unspoiled habitat on the other side of the road because it was
crushed by the wheels of a gas-guzzling SUV.
To steal a job from a hard-working American.
I donít know why the chicken crossed the road, but Iíll bet it was getting a government grant to
cross the road, and Iíll bet someone out there is already forming a support group to help chickens
with crossing-the-road syndrome. Can you believe this? How much more of this can red blooded
Americans take? Chickens crossing the road paid for by their tax dollars, and when I say tax
dollars, Iím talking about your money, money the government took from you to build roads for
chickens to cross.
Because the chicken was gay! Isnít it obvious? Canít you people see the plain truth in front of
your face? The chicken was going to the ďother side.Ē Thatís what they call it-the other side. Yes,
my friends, that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we
boycott all chickens Ďtil we sort out this abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with
seemingly harmless phrases like ďthe other side.Ē
Did the chicken cross the road?
Did he cross it with a toad?
Yes, the chicken crossed the road,
But why it crossed, Iíve not been told.
To die. In the rain. Alone.
MARTIN LUTHER KING, JR.
I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.
In my day, we didnít ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken
crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.
Isnít that interesting? In a few moments we will be listening to the chicken tell, for the first
time, the heart-warming story of how it experienced a serious case of molting and went on to
accomplish its life-long dream of crossing the road.
Imagine all the chickens crossing roads in peace.
It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
It was a historical inevitability.
This was an unprovoked act of sedition and we were justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on
I may not agree with what the chicken did, but I will defend to the death its right to do it.
I donít recall any chicken crossing any road.
To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.
You saw it cross the road with your own eyes! How many more chickens have to cross before you
The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the road reveals your underlying
I have just released eChicken2003, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your
important documents, and balance your checkbook- and Internet Explorer is an inextricable part of
No one called to warn me which way that chicken was going. I had a standing order at the farmerís
market to sell my eggs when the price dropped to a bird gave me any insider information.
Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?
I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. It depends on what you mean by chicken. Would you
define chicken ?
And God came down from the heavens, and He said unto the chicken, ďThou shalt cross the road.Ē And
the chicken crossed the road, and there was much rejoicing.